The person who'd updated her status to defend Pollack—"[Person] is wondering why it's acceptable to pick on small children on gossip websites"—later changed her status to "[Person] is going to write more 'blind item' status updates so more people will post on her wall," and we can see why—she netted 6 new friends from the whole deal! So that's one kind of Facebook status update: The blind item.
What are the other kinds? Because I'm a word nerd who likes challenges, I get mad at the type of people who are too lazy to adhere to the enforced "[Person] is" construction of status updates. Example: "[Person] is when will I be loved? That is a good song, but still, no. Thanks for ruining it lol. See what you did Mairsa? You just killed any possibility of an erection. Now you need to make him a sandwich. Now everybody comments on my status, thanks guys … , :.
Dude… he is too attractive, and super talented. Just realize that there is no one that has a voice like that.
And plus he just matured and his voice got deeper. And I bet your voice was just as high when you were So shut up and mind your own buisness, kay? You see how only one person liked this? Yeah that is because you are an idiot.
And a sexist pig. So make your own Damn Sandwich, lazy ass. You can go ahead and play with yourself too, because with that kind of comment, your not getting a girl in your bed anytime soon. Usually the idiots are the brunnettes that dye their hair blonde. Calm yourself…. It is not a dis on your precious Justine Beaver, it is just a joke to make people laugh.
Just a suggestion. You lose a life. Would you like to try again? Best punishment to a boy: Give him a mobile phone, with lots of balance and girls phone numbers and leave him at a place where there is no network. You stupid hater! How much coke has Charlie Sheen done? That is awesome, but you have a bunch of people scratching there head.
Justin Bieber is a fag and needs to grow up. I dont understand why you have to be rude about it… wow If the rest of the world was as rude as you were id be scared for our generation….
If you see us without an erection, make us a sandwich! There are 10 types of people in this world. Teacher: Hey students, I encouraged you to join the amazing race. Take note, Its not just a race. Justin bieber: when will my arse stop hurting J B;s dad: -. Needs money for food. God bless. This is an awesome list! Made me laugh. Going to forward to my friends now in FB.
Ahhh shit. All for Justin Beiber, how cute.. Just out trolling, carry on haha. You probably know all of the Justin Websites. I can just see you now…35 years old, cats, and lbs. Get a life, and a waist. Go rent a brain cell and read the joke again. Are you making his money, Aim Pownall? I think not. What an idiot. She has a boyfriend? They tell us to send our clothes to the starving in Africa, Believe me if they can fit into mine they are not starving….
A divorced man walks over to his ex-wifes new hubby n asked…so how does it feel enjoying 2nd hand goods?.. Why the hell does everyone dis on Justin bieber?
What did he do to you? My bf said he was gunna give me the world but i told him in this rate of crimes n this resesion i dont want it lol …. Please copy and paste this to your status if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a punch in the face. People who need a punch in the face affect the lives of many.
There is still no known cure for someone who deserves a punch in the face, except for a punch in the face. But we can still raise awareness! I think its hilarious! Answer: Mother fucker.. If enough of you do this, you CAN make a difference! Hello everyone.
Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? New one… X thought he saw a ninja while driving home today… Turned out to be just a light pole… Or was it?
I just made this one up.. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Time limit is exhausted. Sign in. Forgot your password? Get help. Privacy Policy. Password recovery. Considering Venturing into Hemp Production? Here is What You Need to….
How Gamers Can Aim for Sustainability. How to Empower your business with Artificial Intelligence. Enhancing Your Game Streaming. Beam Shaper. Crypto Platforms Lending Ethereum. Such a Wonderful Collection.. My favorite one was about eating the giant marshmallow, and waking up to find your pillow gone. Fab …………….!! The Justin Bieber jokes are not funny. None of this was funny.
It was crappy grammar and punctuation also. These are seriously funny. If u wanna see more funny fb statuses go to funnystatus. Slept like log last night,, woke up in the fireplace. That awkward moment when Pinocchio and Voldemort meet. This stuff really made me laugh. Where do you keep all of that tomato sauce?
Try putting this on your status if you want your friends to get a laugh. Can I get 69 likes on this. Sorry, I just need something to match my full-time job. Eww wtf who would say tat loke ugh what if there is younger people reading thiz. If I tell you your ass looks fat will you stop asking? A lot of people have no talent. Everything is made in china , except babies, theyre made vachina c;. Too many cmoplnimets too little space, thanks!
I Love these hahahaaa! Freakin Funny i love the ladder! Well fuck u! If, all men are dogs…I guess dat just makes all women pussy cats..? Assholes and opinions everybody has one and yours stink. These are really funny i use them for my statuses on facebook.
Hey, Jay Murphy, that was pretty good lol. As if talkin to my wall is bad enuff…i have to type it on my facebook wall too. Steve Jobs is dead, you idiot; it was all over the news! Awesome stuff, really appreciable, searching for that from long time. Good list. Girl: Yhur a butthole.. This is so hilarious. I love the justin beaver ones they seriously made my day.
Nyssa Usher! Very nice jokes…. LawL love thes things but some are tooo stupid. Lovee thessee maaan ther soo funnyy.. The Justin Bieber ones were my favorite! Twinkle Twinkle little whore relationships come in twos, not in fours. Twinkle Twinkle my little slut spread your cheeks and whipe your butt.
Twinkle Twinkle little slut spread your cheeks so I can fuck your butt. Dang, I didnt think anybody knew that I was gay…. I got so many likes from these on FB,they had ma Lmao! Wow, that funny! But some are too icky. My niece Mason was looking at my laptop screen!! These were soo alsome.. Omg I posted one of these statuses and got Almost 4 like in 5 minutes! This stastus with codebar is the best.
Never moon a werewolf. Ketamine — Just say nay How do deaf people know if someone is screaming or yawning? Why does everyone think my Dads are gay? I just ended a long-term relationship today. Well some of these are really funny , Others just stupid! Dinosaurs were lies, fed to us to cover up the existence of Pokemon. Your mom… bitch quit reading status and go make me a damn sandwich! Really good website haha pissed myself just reading them!! Its funny guys remember your bra size but not your birthdate..
This comment is hacked, you can like it as many times as you like :. Ahaha dont u just live how my name and my comment coincide? OH WOW!! Men marry becoz they are tired, women becoz they are curious;n both are disappointed; lolx;.
Haha , wow , half of it really make sense! Wonder no more: we've graciously translated 15 of the most common status updates to help you pass the all-important exam of who to unfollow. Your news feed will thank us. Status: "It only takes one minute to reach out to your congressman and stand up for underprivileged kids' right to safe playground equipment that isn't made of toxic GMO Monsanto products. Status: "New York City, I am in you!
So far I've only eaten cheap pizza because I am afraid to commit to eating at a restaurant for fear that it is not trendy enough. Also, please hang out with me while I'm here, as I have no one with whom to be merry.
Status: "Who's out on the Eastside tonight?! Status: "Tonight's dinner experiment: hanger steak with red wine reduction, truffled asparagus, twice-baked potatoes, and homemade peach cobbler. Nom nom, total success! I haven't eaten hot food in three years. Status: "When I first came up with the idea for my tech startup, people thought I was crazy for wanting to invest hundreds of hours into creating an app that pairs up dog owners with nearby unused leashes and extra poop bags.
It's been a wild year, but it's all worth it once you find that mentor who truly believes in you. And I finally found someone who thinks they can leverage this quality for their own personal gain. Status: "Not all who wander are lost. Status: "I'm purging my friend list, so if you'd like to still stay connected, post something in the comments or send me a message.
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